January 1, 2014

The 2013 Lady Blitz Season Awards and Ranking Black Monday Coaching Moves

Well, it wasn't rocket science exactly but I came away with a 13 - 3 record in the picks in Week 17 to close out the regular season at 162 - 93 - 1, a 64% hit rate.  The tides have turned in a big way this season with five newcomers (Chiefs, Chargers, Panthers, Eagles Saints) to the 2014 playoffs and surprisingly big slumps by four teams from last year's playoffs (Texans, Falcons, Redskins, Vikings).  With all that in mind, it's time to hand out the end-of-season Lady Blitz hardware (or is it software?) and sort through the sick Black Monday tradition of coach firings.

The Lady Blitz 2013 Season Awards


My Best Preseason Prediction - With so many breakouts in the league this year (yay, NFL parity!) I wasn't quite as crisp in my preseason predictions this time as I was a year ago.  Still, I picked 21 teams' win-loss records within 2 wins (66%), 14 within 1 win (44%) and 4 teams right on the nose (Bears, Cowboys, Ravens, 49ers).  I also predicted 8 of the 12 playoff teams including the surprisingly resurgent Kansas City Chiefs, whom I'm giving myself a pat on the back for here:
  • "I'll be rooting for the Chiefs to make the leap this year and at least get into a good wild card race with teams like Miami and Indy.  Even though it's a bit of a stretch, if KC can buy into the new regime and cut down on turnovers with the more conservative Alex Smith, the Chiefs have a real shot at 9 - 7 and possibly better."

My Worst Preseason Prediction - There were five teams that I really shanked it on this year by five or more wins/losses.  Like more than a few know-nothings, I completely overestimated the Falcons, Texans and Redskins and underestimated the Panthers and Jets.  (P.S., Kudos to the Jets front office for sticking to their guns with Rex Ryan - he's been doing something with nothing ever since Mark Sanchez's hair labyrinth came to town in 2009).  Of all of these, I feel like I should have paid more attention to the warning signs in Washington.  They had lots of unlikely success in 2012 that ended on a sour note with Robert Griffin's injury and rifts with the Shanahans:
  • "I'm still pretty thunderstruck with how pro-ready Robert Griffin was last year, and he's got a very well-rounded supporting cast on both sides of the ball to have a relatively successful year.  I can see Washington getting to 10 - 6 this year if they get a few lucky bounces along the way."

Best Surprises of the Season - They aren't exactly my rivalrous (new word!) cup of tea, but how about those Panthers for refusing to repeat history after a 1 - 3 start and creating a highly successful ground and pound lifestyle under "Riverboat" Ron Rivera?  The NFC will be stacked for the playoffs, but don't count out the #2 seed Panthers just yet after their 11 - 1 run to end the season.  Also, how great was the Chargers' chip-in-a-chair run for the final AFC playoffs spot?  They've already beaten the Broncos in Denver and had to have about a million things go right to get here, so maybe they'll be this year's Cinderella story a la the Ravens, Giants and Packers in recent years.  Finally, give honorable mentions to Bruce Arians' Cardinals, who should be in the playoffs even with Carson Palmer, and Rob Ryan's defensive turnaround for the Saints despite a litany of injuries to start the season.  Good stuff all around!

Worst Collapses of the Season - For once, I actually feel bad for the Cowboys for getting so close to the playoffs and falling short yet again with major injuries and--but of course--a gut-wrenching interception at the end of the fourth quarter.  But it's understandable, especially without Tony Romo to "blame."  Much less excusable was the Lions' 1 - 6 slide after looking like a sure bet on Thanksgiving.  With the Bears and Packers reeling at QB, all they had to do was win two games with the likes of Matt Stafford, Calvin Johnson, and a solid defensive front with very manageable dome games against the Ravens, Giants and Vikings.  Instead, they continue to bring soul-crushing disappointment to the city of Detroit.  But perhaps the biggest disappointment this year had to be the Falcons.  If my suspect memory serves me, there has been only one other instance in the NFL where a former #1 seed fell to 4 wins or fewer the subsequent season.  Yes, Atlanta had tough injuries to surmount this year, but they were also more mistake-prone and less consistent on both sides of the ball that have been so uncharacteristic in previous years for Mike Smith and Matt Ryan.  Sunday's bobbled snap with less than a minute to go was all too appropriate for the Falcons' miserable season - poor Tony Gonzalez deserved better than this... Not that I'm complaining.

Non-Peyton Manning Hero Award - Have you picked up your jaw yet after watching Aaron Rodgers' stunning 4th and 8 TD pass to sneak past the Bears to clinch the NFC North in his first game since October?  Me neither.  Green Bay will have to do a lot--and without Clay Matthews--to make a run in January, but this team is suddenly very dangerous.  Still, if I'm being fair to those who played the whole 2013 season, defensive juggernaut Luke Kuechley would deserve my vote as Peyton's runner-up to MVP this year.  It's like he has some multiplier Mortal Kombat superpower that allows him to cover both sidelines and give opponents no chance to run the ball or do more than dink or dunk in the passing game.  Just try to count how many yards this guy runs in a drive and wonder how many carbs he's loading every Sunday.

My New Superbowl Prediction - The Broncos and Seahawks seemed like locks well into November in most fans' minds, but this postseason already has the feel of an upset spectacular to me.  I still think the Seahawks will ride that homefield advantage all the way to the Meadowlands, but somebody is going to upset Peyton's Broncos like they always do.  I like the Patriots making their sixth run in the Brady/Belichick era with Von Miller out and the ghosts of collapse circling Manning's dreams.  And I like the Seahawks winning it all in a snowy ground-and-pound magnum opus.


Ranking the Black Monday Coaching Moves

I'm not a big fan of the "Black Monday" tradition.  Who would be in a league that is so fickle with coaching staff despite all of the variables in player health, front office moves and scheduling in a wildly short 16-game season?  Sometimes they pay dividends as with Andy Reid moving to the Chiefs this year, but so often they seem to end in the eternal revolving doors of the Browns, Raiders and Bills.  Anyway, if we have to ogle at people losing their livelihoods and signaling that a franchise office has given up, here's my rankings from best to worst:

1) Jim Schwartz, Major Opportunity Cost - I'm probably beating a dead horse here, but the Lions are doing some serious favors by moving on from Coach Schwartz.  They gave the guy five years and a heckuva roster to step up in the ever-competitive NFC North.  Other than one wild card playoff run in 2011, Detroit has been the same as it ever was, losing too many close games, going heavy on turnovers and penalties, and showing a general lack of discipline on and off the field.  But the good news for the Lions is that this is a young team with a lot of talent, and for that reason, this vacancy should get more interest than just about any other job out there.  Moving Schwartz was the right move, and Detroit likely has the best chances of landing a better replacement.

2) Mike Shanahan, Washington Exile - I will say, after reading Slow Getting Up by Nate Jackson, I have a lot more respect for Shanny than I would otherwise.  He walked into a pretty volatile situation in Washington to begin with, and last year's breakout success may have been the thing that did him in before this season ever started.  The Redskins faithful got a taste of success with one of the most flawless rookie QB/RB performances in the history of the league that obviously did not repeat itself in 2013.  More obviously and importantly, however, Coach Shanahan will forever be tied to Robert Griffin's fateful wild card knee injury and the subsequent fallout with player(s) and fans alike that proved beyond repair.  To quote a brilliant analogy, he was the scapegoat of a Washington franchise that is the rich kid nobody really liked in high school: "Everyone wanted to hang out with him again, right up until the point where he wrapped the Camaro around a telephone pole, at which point everyone felt justified in just writing him off as a complete **** for good.  The Redskins are that kid and Robert Griffin III is our Camaro."

3) Greg Schiano, Disapproving Helicopter Dad - I'm kind of surprised to put Schiano this low on the list, but if nothing else, he had less time to mold his "Schiano men" than the two unemployed schlocks above.  Nevertheless, the guy wasted no time earning the reputation of a toes-on-the-line, micromanaging disciplinarian who happened to lose a lot of games and goodwill in the locker room.  If building a winning culture was his aim, he pretty much sprinted in the opposite direction with a very public falling out with Josh Freeman and a mountain of disapproving quotes from other anonymous players.  Throw in a MRSA outbreak in the locker room and you've got yourself one of the cruelest metaphors for Schiano's reign of terror in Tampa.

4) Rob Chudzinski, Unproven Tragic Hero - After just a year in Cleveland, Rob Chudzinski has proven one of the most drastic Black Monday sacrifices in media coverage for a reason.  He walked into a pretty miserable roster situation managed by a front office that won't be winning any business ethics awards this decade.  What's more, the Browns had already signaled they were going to take the long view by trading Trent Richardson less than a month into the season, and then of course, were immediately down to third string QB Jason Campbell. Hopefully Chudzinski will be given another chance at least as a coordinator somewhere, because the Browns' front office is clearly still throwing darts as a modus operandi.  #FancyWerds

5) Leslie Frazier, Right Place/Wrong Time - Somewhat similar to Mike Shanahan's situation above, the Vikings' Leslie Frazier may have fallen victim to impossible expectations after taking his team to the playoffs in an unlikely fashion a year ago.  Of course, he was never given a huge vote of confidence, rising through the ranks as an interim coach when Brad Childress was fired.  But don't tell me Frazier wouldn't have done just as well if he had Brett Favre under center instead of Christian Ponder.  Heck, in my opinion, Frazier has done as could be expected and much more with the roster he inherited inside a highly competitive division.  Sure, this season was disappointing in terms of losses, but the fact that Minnesota stayed competitive through Week 17 and that even third string RB Matt Asiata could muster 100+ yard games in Coach Frazier's care speaks volumes to me about what he could have done with another roster hole or two filled. 

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