The Rise of the Dallas Rookies
The Cowboys looked primed for a small-scale revival with a healthy Tony Romo returning after a down-and-out 4 - 12 campaign in 2015... until Romo immediately suffered another back injury in the preseason. Little-hyped fourth-rounder Dak Prescott stepped in and the rest is history. We knew Ezekiel Elliott would take full advantage of Dallas' mighty offensive line, but in combination with Prescott's efficient passing game, the Cowboys fought their way to a 13 - 3 record, the top seed in the NFC and Rookie of the Year honors for Prescott. Even I found myself rooting for Dallas this year, and I don't regret it.
Michael Thomas' Quietly Great Debut
I don't have much else to write about the Saints this season, but just underneath all of the deserved fanfare for Elliott and Prescott, another rookie had a quietly outstanding year - Michael Thomas. Thomas finished the year with 92 receptions - the second-most by a rookie in NFL history - and 1,137 yards, seventh-best all-time. And this isn't your run-of-the-mill dink and dunk kind of receiver - he does stuff like this that might put him right up there with Odell Beckham in another year or two. #cantguardmike
The Giants' Defensive Resurrection
If there's a unit that deserves big kudos for most improved by a wide margin this season, it has to be the New York Giants' defense. In 2015, they were a rudderless squad without a pass rush, and that let to a league-worst performance in total yards and passing yards allowed and third-worst in points allowed. So the Giants took a gamble with some big acquisitions in the offseason including Olivier Vernon to crash the line of scrimmage and Janoris Jenkins to play the role of shutdown corner, and they ended 2016 as one of the best defenses in the NFL, second only to the Patriots in points allowed. With those big free agents paying off and New York getting great play from its young, emerging stars Landon Collins and Eli Apple, the Giants' turnaround should be considered far more than a fluke.
Boatghazi-ghazi
Speaking of the Giants, there wasn't a dumber media phenomenon this season than Boatghazi, a.k.a. the manufactured outrage toward New York's receivers for taking a trip to Miami on their off day before wild card weekend. They had the audacity - the audacity! - not only to fly to South Beach on a planned day off between Week 17 and the playoffs but also to take a picture with Justin Bieber on a dang boat. What followed was a snowball of tabloid obsession that made this non-story into the story going into the Giants' next game against the Packers. Add in a couple early drops by Odell Beckham and Boatghazi became a self-fulfilling prophecy of New York's doom, despite the fact that it was the Giants defense that gave up a half-time Hail Mary and let Aaron Rodgers eat them alive in the third quarter to seal the loss. Do I think a 3-hour plane ride and some beachside R&R did Beckham and company in that wild card weekend? Absolutely not. But I do think the op-ed swirl around that day and the media’s obsession with its own obsession probably made it difficult for these players to move past their early jitters at Lambeau without connecting it to what those hacks and trolls would be saying. If you make a big enough deal of something, it ultimately becomes a big deal. Kind of like the Buccaneers trading up to get formerly highly accurate kicker Roberto Aguayo in the second round and giving him an automatic case of the yips when he wasn’t perfect.
Le'Veon Bell's All-Purpose Romp
Hopefully Le'Veon Bell can start a full season sometime in the future when the Steelers sign him to a fat long-term contract - he seems primed for a non-quarterback MVP run. Despite missing the first three games of the season, Bell managed to rack up 140 all-purpose yards or more in nine games, often carrying the offense on his back when Ben Roethlisberger couldn't. Arguably his best performance of the year was in a snowy Week 14 battle in the trenches in Buffalo where he put up 236 yards on the ground and Pittsburgh won comfortably despite Big Ben's disastrous 0 TD, 3 INT stat line. And it's not just putting up big numbers, it's Bell's very patient style in which he looks like he's going to run into a wall of linemen before cutting into a suddenly open gap for big gains. I guarantee you'll see a lot more running backs give this style a try next year - it's just hard to say who will actually be able to do what Bell can.
Seahawks-Cardinals, 6 - 6 (OT)
Ah yes, the ultimate Rorschach test of whether the NFL is good anymore took place on Sunday night (and for some folks Monday morning) in Week 8. After a slew of underwhelming blowouts and C-list matchups in prime time in the weeks before, we got a very sloppy, low-scoring affair - in fact, it brought us the lowest points scored ever in an overtime NFL game. There were blocked punts, blocked field goals and turnovers on downs, amounting to a 3 - 3 (!) tie at the end of the fourth quarter. Making matters worse, both teams had the opportunity to put the game away with field goal attempts inside the 30 yardline in the fifth quarter, but they shanked all of those kicks badly, and the rest is very unremarkable history.
Julio Jones' Career-Ruining Day
If I were a more magnanimous person, I could write a whole post just about how amazing all of those playmakers were on the Falcons' offense this season. But I'm going to streamline it to Julio Jones, who did plenty to ensure an Atlanta Super Bowl win when nobody else ultimately did. More on that later. Anyway, Jones has been a top tier receiver for the entirety of his NFL career, and one of the pinnacles of his work to date had to be his 300-yard, 12-catch receiving day against the Panthers in Week 4, nearly doubling his previous career-best performance. It was enough to send Carolina's CB Bene Benwikere packing less than a week later and make Carolina wish it had a time machine to keep Josh Norman under the franchise tag many moons earlier. Julioooooo.
Ryan Pickspatrick
If you believe there should be an equal and opposite reaction for Jones' stellar day for Atlanta, look no further than Ryan Fitzpatrick's six-interception debacle in Kansas City. I have so, so many questions about this. For one, why does Fitzpatrick continue to insist on throwing to the right sideline after the second pick on that side of the field? Why did Todd Bowles think, "Eh, four picks are bad, but..." and "Five picks are bad, but..." instead of putting in one of the millions of other mediocre Jets quarterbacks on the sideline when it was still a two-score game? Perhaps the worst part of all of this is that the Fitz had a clean pocket most of the afternoon with just 10 pressures in 47 dropbacks. Give those Harvard grads too much time to think, and the ish can really hit the fan.
Matt Stafford's Fourth Quarter Mojo
The Lions eventually flamed out in January once again like they do, but before all of that, they broke an NFL record with eight fourth-quarter comeback wins this season. That may not bode so well for future years because of its fluky nature, but Matt Stafford deserves a lot of credit for his many season-saving sub-two-minute drills against the likes of the Vikings, Bears, Colts and Redskinks. He was even a viable MVP candidate before Matt Ryan and Aaron Rodgers caught fire due to the improbable myriad ways he marched Detroit down the field with mere seconds on the clock. Of course, I'd be remiss if I didn't also give props to kicker Matt Prater for topping off a number of drives with go-ahead field goals and to Detroit's secondary for at least three game-sealing picks. And since this is the most joy Lions fans will be able to feel for many months to come, you can check out each of those comebacks here including Stafford's final pièce de résistance - a touchdown scramble in traffic against the Bears that would eventually yield a wild card spot.
Chris Boswell's Sad Rabona
Even though Le'Veon Bell was tremendous, I'm still not sure what to think of the Steelers this year. They might have been one of the most underwhelming teams to make a conference championship in recent memory due to their inconsistent offense and sometimes vulnerable defensive scheming. So if Bell was the best thing to come out of Pittsburgh this season, I give you arguably the worst individual play of the entire year, kicker Chris Boswell's failed rabona of an onside kick. In fairness, the Steelers didn't have much to lose being down by a touchdown with less than a minute to go, and Boswell's done this play successfully before in college, but when the execution is just plain bad, that's all we'll ever remember. Just ask Marcus Colston.
Eric Berry's Pick Eight
For all the understandable worship that quarterbacks get for being the most central to their teams' success, I relish those instrumental non-passer performances that come up a few times a season like Eric Berry's pick six and pick two versus the Falcons in Week 13. In case your memory is rusty, the Chiefs ended up winning that game by just one point, so it's fair to say that without their top safety, Kansas City doesn't win that one or earn the #2 seed in the AFC. (Now, what they ultimately did with that bye week and home game in the divisional round is another sad story for later on). Berry has long been one of the most dynamic defensive players in the game, and it's not just the situational nature of these two plays that make them great - they also showcase his Xs and Os savvy at sitting on routes and befuddling the best quarterback of 2016 as well as his elusiveness and speed with the ball in the open field. Now if only the Chiefs could get him to the Super Bowl he deserves...
The Surprising Success of Exotic Smashmouth
Considering that I predicted 8 of 12 playoff contenders this season, I can't beat myself up too much over my preseason projections, BUT one team I was delightfully surprised I underestimated was the Tennessee Titans. Having gone 5 - 27 over the previous two seasons and opting to bring back historically awful coach Mike Mularkey for a full-time head coaching gig seemed like a really bad idea to me, especially when he trotted out that gotta-be-a-gimmick exotic smashmouth mantra. Fast forward a year later, and Mularkey is coming off of the Titans' first winning season in five years - a season in which they had a real shot at winning the division well into December due to the revived running game of DeMarco Murray and the evolution of Marcus Mariota as a pretty darn efficient and versatile passer. As I've often mentioned in this space before, I'm grateful when the Titans are good because we are subjected to them every week in our viewing area, and it's hard not to cheer for Mariota as an up-and-coming passer with potential really starting to come through. Sorry I doubted you, coach, and special props to Tennessee's superb offensive line for seeing through the smashmouth part of the deal.
The Raiders' Cruel Fate
Speaking of young teams on the rise, who didn't love the Raiders this year? They were like the anti-Jaguars with all of their top draft picks reaching their full potential and taking this team to its first playoff appearance in 14 (!) seasons. And yet, as Oakland was eyeing the top seed in the AFC and rallying around MVP hopeful Derek Carr, he broke his fibula toward the end of a Week 16 blowout. Gone were the Raiders' chances of making a deep postseason run or knocking off the Patriots along the way to make the Super Bowl more interesting - they were dead men walking by the time they faced the somewhat less hapless Texans in the wild card round. The good news is that Oakland have their top talent locked up for a while with Carr, Amari Cooper and Defensive Player of the Year Khalil Mack. The bad news is that it's just hard to string together that many wins year over year, and it could take a few years for the Raiders to have another shot like that, especially if Tom Brady's still playing into his 50s.
The Texans' Quarterback "Controversy"
There are probably some fancy statistical models out there to identify even worse free agency deals this season, but no dud was more visible than Brock Osweiler's abysmal debut in Houston. After playing a few games for Denver behind a historically good defense and a balanced rushing attack, Osweiler was hung out to dry as a starter for the Texans. He finished 29th of 30 qualified quarterbacks in passer rating and dead last in yards per attempt by a wide margin, which should give any Houston fan heartburn over the $19 million he is due this upcoming season and the $25 million in dead cap money they'd have to shell out to cut him. You know it's bad when your fans would rather see you benched for Tom Savage - a career backup who'd previously played in just one NFL game two years prior - even when you're fighting neck and neck for a division title. Eventually, Savage got a concussion and the Texans were forced to turn back to Osweiler for another pathetic divisional round performance in Foxborough. But he's going to be a fat sunk cost for a little while to come - the Broncos really dodged a bullet there whether they meant to or not.
The Latest Andy Reid Clock Management Disaster
If there's a team that always makes me the Charlie Brown to Lucy's football, it has to be the Kansas City Chiefs. They've had four consecutive winning seasons, three playoff bids and a division title since Andy Reid and Alex Smith came to town, yet there's something about January that puts this highly talented and well-balanced team in neutral like... clockwork. What could it be? Oh yeah, it's the 100% certainty with which Andy Reid will attempt to bend the rules of time and space when all his team needs is just one dang measly two-minute drill. It happened yet again in the Chiefs' latest postseason flame out this year. Down by eight with less than 10 minutes left in the game, Reid dialed up an agonizing seven-minute touchdown drive and also burned his second timeout in the process. When the Chiefs' two-point conversion and onside kick failed, they found themselves completely out of options to win yet again. Nevermind that they had kept the Steelers out of the end zone all night and could have easily gotten themselves another possession with just a little urgency. That's not how Andy Reid rolls, and it never will be to the misery of KC fans everywhere.
Commonplace Aaron Rodgers Miracles
Just when you think you've seen it all from No. 12, he does something even more insane that just shouldn't happen, kind of like Steph Curry making a half court shot while draped by defenders on both sides. Last year, Aaron Rodgers gave us the game-clinching Miracle in Motown and two consecutive Hail Marys to take the game to overtime in the divisional round versus Arizona. This year, he put his money where his mouth was by running the table after starting out 4 - 6 with plenty of dazzling plays to boot. Those included a 60-yard bomb in the final 30 seconds in Chicago to set up a game-winning field goal, a jujitsu pocket scramble and a half-time Hail Mary to crush the Giants' hopes in the wild card round, and this last-second laser to Jared Cook on the sideline to edge past the Cowboys in the divisional round. None of these plays make any sense - and any other quarterback who's attempted them has had about a 10% success rate at best. But Rodgers just keeps making the near-impossible seem not just easy, but expected when his back is against the wall, and it's a lot of fun for the rest of us when our team isn't playing the Packers.
Dallas vs. Green Bay, Divisional Round
If I were doing the typical “best games of the season” post, there would be a few worth mentioning alongside some of the others referenced around here - the Steelers-Cowboys shootout of Week 10, Oakland’s gutsy two-point conversion against the Saints in Week 1, Aaron Rodgers and Matt Ryan trading spectacular touchdown drives in Week 8 and Seattle’s goal-line stand against the Patriots in Week 10. But overall, I’d say the most exciting game of the year (for non-Patriots fans anyway) had to be the Cowboys versus the Packers in the divisional round. It had the kind of star power and fanfare that big-market fanbases bring, but it also completely lived up to the hype. Green Bay took an early decisive lead that built to a 15-point margin in the third quarter thanks to big drives by Aaron Rodgers and WR-to-RB Ty Montgomery. But for those wondering if eventual Rookie of the Year Dak Prescott would buckle under the limelight, he rattled off two touchdowns, a two-point conversion and field goal drive in the fourth quarter to pull even with the Packers, thanks in no small part to a huge day from Dez Bryant. I for one thought Green Bay was cooked at that point as they’ve been in several of the most agonizing playoff losses we’ve seen in the past five years. But with less than 15 seconds left on the clock at their own 32-yard line right after Rodgers took a huge blindside sack, he delivered with that freakish sideline throw to give Mason Crosby a 51-yard chance, and the rest is history.
The Los Angeles Freakin' Chargers
And now for a non-game time “dumbest thing” of epic proportions - Dean Spanos’ highly unadvisable decision to move the Chargers from San Diego to Los Angeles next season. To recap how this house of cards came to be, Rams owner Sam Kroenke jockeyed his way past the Chargers and Raiders to L.A. last season by working a deal that would allow the Chargers one year to decide whether they wanted to lease the stadium too. Spanos tried and failed to use that as leverage in a public referendum for the city to fund a new stadium in San Diego, but residents didn’t bite by a wide margin because, you know, their team owner is a billionaire in one of the richest sports leagues in the world. And so against many other owners’ advice, Spanos unilaterally opted to move another underperforming and unpopular team to a city that didn’t want the first one and certainly doesn’t care one matcha latte for this second wave of transplants. In fact, until the new stadium is built in Inglewood, the Chargers will be playing in the 30,000-seat StubHub Center, where the landlords have been abundantly clear that this team is second banana to the MLS L.A. Galaxy. Putting fuel on the fire, they might not have franchise stalwarts Philip Rivers and Antonio Gates, and they’ll be starting over with a new coach who will probably need a whole lot of time and luck to make this team remotely relevant in three years. My guess is the aggressively apathetic fans of Los Angeles aren’t going to go out of their way to see the Chargers through the dark times ahead in this extraordinarily dumb change of scenery.
Atlanta's Super Bowl Collapse
I tried to be as nice as could be expected to the Falcons last week while also acknowledging all of the crazy, unbelievable things the Patriots did to come back from a 25-point deficit in the third quarter and win the first overtime Super Bowl. So having paid my penance, can we keep talking about all of the astounding things Atlanta did to blow said 25-point lead? Even trying to set my own rooting interests aside, I think I’ve settled on this being more embarrassing than the Warriors and Indians blowing 3 - 1 leads in their respective championships this past year given the size of the viewing audience and the sheer win probabilities the Falcons had through the game’s first 55 minutes before falling off of a mile-high cliff. What were they [over]thinking when they decided to run the ball just four times (four!) after building a 25-point lead in the second half, having just gashed the Patriots for 86 yards and nine yards per carry on the ground in the first half? How did they blow so many chances to put the game away after 1) recovering an onside kick on one possession; and 2) getting within the Pats’ 25-yard line on another and coming away with zero points? Why did they have to ruin that incredible Julio Jones catch that should have been on highlight reels for years to come with one of the most indefensible sets of play-calling I've ever seen thereafter? Why did Matt Ryan keep snapping the ball with 15 and 20+ seconds left on the play clock over and over to give Brady even an inch? It’s truly mind-boggling when you put all of the pieces together, so either this thing was rigged or Atlanta is genuinely cursed in mystical ways that cannot be put to human words.
The Year of the Offensive Line
Aw man, you're thinking, if you made it this far in this monster post. Why would JLotz save such an unsexy topic like offensive lines for the final best or dumbest thing about the NFL season? Well, you know what? Offensive lines matter a whole lot, and they never get the public appreciation they deserve for anchoring most of the highlight reels and top performances in the league. This year, that was all the more apparent for most of the NFL's top brass. As I've mentioned a few times before, the Falcons offense went from good to non-ironic elite when Alex Mack came over from the Browns and Atlanta managed to start every game this year with the same five guys - it paid off not just in protecting MVP Matt Ryan but making the Falcons' ground game one of the most efficient in the league. Then there was the Patriots' coaxing OL coach Dante Scarnacchia out of retirement after last year's 20-quarterback-hit fiasco versus Denver in the AFC Championship. He transformed Marcus Cannon from a withering human turnstile into an All Pro in a matter of months - and his team won another freakin' Super Bowl. Then there are up-and-comers like the Raiders and Titans who've invested heavily in their gigantic lines through the draft and free agency in recent years and who will certainly be hyped as playoff contenders going into the 2017 season because of how good they were offensively this season. Seahawks, take note - this could be you if you put more than, say 4.5% of your cap allocation toward your offensive line next year.
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